New Plan / Old Team

We'll go back to Robert Wood Johnson early Monday morning for the biopsy - 8 am -Special Procedures Admitting-- probably home by Noon.

That's Fine
This is a serious financial pain -- if the new team would have stepped up to the plate, we would have 100% coverage from insurance. As it is, we'll pay the first $300 as a deductible, then 20% of the rest.

I think the Hematology/Oncologist there dropped the ball. The radiologist wasn't particularly dynamic either. She dismissed her chances of success right out of hand and sent me home.

The old team won't let that happen, they have more experience with these types of cases -- my own case started the same way 4 years ago -- meaning that the first bone biopsy was completely negative. It was bone from the iliac crest -- the big wavy part of the hip that swings out to the side. My "diagnostic" biopsy in 2005 was done at RWJ from INSIDE the SACRUM. So that's what we're going for again.

Good.

Also; had meant to write a note about what this feeling is like -- having pain in my lower back -- since it's not really like just having a backache. Maybe longer another time, but in a few words --

It Feels Like Some'Thing'

I like to change & shower when I get home from work; put on flannel pajama pants and a short sleeve polo, ankle socks. Last Friday I got upstairs, flipped my tie onto the end of the bed, undid my shirt, opened my belt and felt my back sort of ... ease ... out and had an idea that I had a lump back there if I could just reach back with my left hand, I would feel it.

Well, no. There is no lump. There is no change in anything back there. It's not pink. It's not warm to the touch, There is no sign -- that I could see in the mirror (and that's getting to be quite a feat since turning my belly around away from the mirror takes a few more degrees of turn than it used to) -- that anything is going on.

But I had the distinct feeling like there was.

Nope.

From the Peanut Gallery

What was the gap? I mean between what happened at the new hospital and what will now have to be done at Robert Wood Johnson (RWJ)?

I think that the oncologist didn't get very involved - I found out when she called me just yesterday that she hadn't reviewed my medical history, hadn't understood the site of the problem on my sacrum (she was only told of the site after I was gone and the radiologist had written her report of the newest CT, she said) - the butterfly shaped bone at the base of the spine - so she didn't work AHEAD of time with the interventional radiologist to prepare them to do their job.

She treated me without care. She said point blank that she saw no need to get familiar with my case until the biopsy had been done since if it turned out to be a hematoma (a bruise), or some other non-cancerous issue, "what would have been the reason for me to have wasted my time on that!" She did not, however, withhold her statement that she had already decided to agree with my other oncologist that I needed radiation to reduce the mass and slow the cell growth. She went on to add that she understood that my present circumstances were due to the failure of the treatment I had received up to this point to have worked well enough.

What?!? We were going for a biopsy because an MRI showed a tumor -- within the sacrum. Not a hematoma. I am not receiving ongoing treatment. There have been no tumors or protein scans or blood test results or gamma globulin levels or organ function or bone pain or ANYTHING since my tandem blood stem cell transplant in 2006!

I was CRUISING away from Multiple Myeloma at light speed and didn't think I needed to look back over my shoulder for NOT ONE MINUTE ... (right?!?) 


Well, she is a Dingbat! And we're done with her.


But I am not done crabbing ....! So; here is some more .... Since the dear doctor had already written a medical order for a procedure - an invasive biopsy of the sacrum - she owes me the duty of work required to prepare herself to decide that the procedure is appropriate. Once there, she had the usual professional obligation to carry her understanding and instructions forward to the technical team  - the interventional radiologist - to help ensure the diagnosis would be accurate and useful. [So I mentally called STRIKE "2" and decided I didn't need to wait for the THIRD pitch...]

It came to me that UNTIL we HAVE a diagnosis, radiation is just a WORD -- not one to be thrown around lightly when the patient is ANXIOUSLY CONCERNED that his cancer may have come OUT of REMISSION.... DAMMIT!

So once she started getting wound up; I was already spinning... meaning I got upset with her and told her that I don't trust her. I said that I thought she should have read my medical history, reviewed the 2 MRI, engaged my other oncologist by phone (they did talk, but she didn't get much from it -- he said twice to me that he would HAVE TO talk with the RADIOLIGIST before the procedure -- I failed to ask HIM to ask HER if she was planning the SAME...my mistake?) and worked with the radiologist to get that tissue sample.

This ends in a few lines ... 

Yesterday afternoon, Femi got a phone call from this fine doctor to hear how her favor to Femi had gone badly in her efforts to help me. She told Femi that I had been "shouting" at her that "I don't trust her." And she embarrassed Femi of her incredibly ungrateful / misogynist husband. (I'm just guessing at this characterization since Femi wouldn't really tell me why she was crying after telling me the story of the phone call but Femi did get a suggestion (two names of other hematology/oncologists) for Femi to approach  --  both male doctors.


Well, now I have a new issue to raise in my future psycho-counseling -- my  gender issues. 

Fine. Yeah. this could have gone better... what a jerk I can be sometimes ... color me 'painted into a corner' ... me and my big mouth ... . UGH!.

Monday - Biopsy